Sixes Can Really Make You Appreciate An Eight

Life is certainly relative. One thing is only cold because something is hot. And once you turn your stove's burner to high and stick your hand straight in there, it's hard to find something hotter. Once you reach that new high, everything else just feels cold.

As soon as I ate that first bite of a Five Guys burger I was torn with emotion, I was so angry when I realized I had been eating nothing but cow lard my whole life, but ecstatic I found the nirvana of hamburger meat. Five Guys was my new bench mark, and every other burger I would ever eat would have to go head to head with this new found glory. This burger ruined any chance of me enjoying another burger again unless it could top these new found standards. It's a serious catch 22.

Secrets ruined bars for me, How I Met Your Mother ruined television for me, V-necks ruined clothing for me, Daniel Tosh ruined standup comedy for me, Call of Duty ruined video games for me, Sex ruined video games for me, 10 ruined 9's for me...